Vunerability

I’ve been at our women’s retreat for the last 2 days and I’m just exhausted; emotionally and physically. I’m sure I’ll post more about this later, but I had to get out a little bit of what is churning within me.

The topic of the retreat was basically about being who you are, taking off the masks we wear and just allowing yourself AND others to be who they are; no Barbies allowed was the subtitle. What was most amazing about the whole thing (and the one thing about our church that I do totally love) was the honesty these woman had and the openness with revealing things that you would really never want to reveal to anyone.

What spoke to me most last night was a woman who spoke about the demands she places on her first-born. It was so amazing to hear that, not even 6 hours after I had posted about my struggles with our Little Rooster. It was like the lightbulb went off in my head…that is what you are doing to him! The pressure that I place on him to be perfect is just so great and it angers me so much when he isn’t, but yet I know I don’t do that with our second born.

Overall, it was an amazing weekend with awesome women and while I feel so refreshed, I also feel so bogged down with so much churning through my head and heart. I just pray for clarity these next few days as I process everything I heard.

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